Dear gawddamn bastard that is you,You've always believed that life is full of shit and that you should never allow yourself to wallow in such a self-deprecating stool. You believed that society is full of scumbags and morons, of lifeless drones and pathetic twits, of living people guillotined with following orders and abiding by the rules. You promised yourself never to be like them, to as much as possible live your wretched life as unperfunctorily as you could get it to be. Oh how you gawddamn hated the guts of these breathing and talking androids borne out of nonsensical yadda yadda’s and clusterfuck idiosyncrasies!
Because you said you were different. Because you resolved to be a nonconformist. Because you believed yourself to be an undiscovered Third World mythical creature.
But what has gotten into you now? You have been living like one of them. Ashen. Lifeless. Devoid of any spirit and conviction. How different are you from these worthless stringed marionettes and walking puppets if you have been allowing yourself to be seized with the very certainty of all things to come your way? What good does it make you if you permit life’s fucked up redundancies and shitty yuppie doldrums to wreck your destiny?
Ah, destiny. Big word. So massive I bet you can’t fuckin’ swallow that in your philosophical lifetime. Chosen path. Preordained order. Fate. Discovering your purpose. Finding your gawddamn spot under the mocking, glaring sun. People have called it by monikers and polysyllables, expounding their point like a fucked up crazy Greek philosopher whose wise spurts no one would even care to swallow. But you only believed in one credo – that destiny is what you make it.
It is what you decide to be, not what awaits your inutile flaccid penis. It is making a choice, not leaving the option to your gawddamn wrinkled scrotum. You make it happen. You take it out of its glossy, abstract context and live and breathe it. Until you finally get the hang of it. Until you have affirmed to follow the one, true path that leads to it.
Was it not just recently that you have affirmed the path you will be taking? It was a tough call. You had to weigh the pro’s and con’s, to prune everything that would leave you no value, to trim down what could be trimmed down. But you managed to hurdle the frackin’ dilemma, you see. Would you gawddamn believe that? Man, I never knew you’d pull that off, never knew you were made of one firm and strong fiber like Harry fuckin' Potter, which is obviously ambiguous to your ectomorphic build.
But now, oh fuckin' now, you’re losing your mojo. Whatever happened to the bastardly angst that has been your buffer for all things shitty? You're sick and tired of everything? You're fed up with all the fuckin' responsiblities? Everybody has his share of problems, a clusterfuck of human quandaries poised to eat up on your weakness. You know what to do? The trick is to shrug it off your system and deal with it. Deal with the gawddamn problem like a man. Like a real man. Not some pathetic eyelid-lining, bangs-curtained face with unlimited emo tendencies.
Oh shut up and don’t be a jerk by telling me that life is unfair! Just in case you haven’t noticed, it is and it has always been. So fuck you and your shitty emoish whimpers. Fuck you for not showing me what you’re really made of. Double fuck you for feeling lost. And insane. And being unsure of yourself.
Just in case I haven't made myself clear how much I loathe the way you deal with your pathetic life's mocking sarcasm and scorns: F-U-C-K Y-O-U! Fuckin' hate your guts for succumbing to derisions.
You can never be a Superman with great powers but know that you haven’t lost your marbles. If you did, you would have surely worn your boxers on top of your blue tights. Remember that all is not lost. Your dreams are still there and unless you’re careful, they will become ashes soon to be forgotten. Shrinking. Until you finally bite the dust. Remember that you were never born a defeatist. And you know very well that this is not what you want your life to end up being. For chrissake, you deserve something far better than this!
Life is a wicked bitch but you have to be a tad bitchier to live!
You had balls when you said this is your destiny. Now, don’t be a castrated clusterfuck and prove it!
Your fuckin’ kickass alter-ego,
Me
P.S. If by tomorrow you’re not done yet with this boorish emo episode, I’m going to gawddamn shove that rusting blade up your ass! Oh yes, I’m fuckin’ meaning it!
*Why SSDD No. 3? Because this is SSDD No. 1 and this is SSDD No. 2
